I waste my life by useless thinking

I waste 2 years to think about 10 mins meeting Linh and Yen.
I waste my time to think about the time I am on board teaching for students. I am wasting my life as though I do not know some days I will be old and die.

I am wasting my life through useless thinking. I could not continue it.
I could not let useless thinking win over me any more. I can not afford it.
I want to cry. I could not afford it.
I can not waste my life any more. I have gone 1/3 of my life. It is enough. Stop useless thinking. Stop throwing my life through windows.